Antoinette came over to hang out – and she did my laundry!!!! I think I must have gone a little mad through all this because I am starting to realize how blessed I am. My friends are amazing. Dana came over after Antoinette left and we were chatting and she said it was the same for her when her brother died. You realized how much love there was in the world. I guess you have to feel grief to know that. I suppose I am lucky I have got to 40 and not felt grief :). But I feel the love now and it makes me giddy