I got out of bed in the middle of the night one night looking for Trevor and tripped on the stool and got a couple of carpet burn boo boos. It is a small scar and i know it won’t last, but now people look at me like I am a moron!! Or just special ed!!

I flew to LA this week (stupid over-doing-it me) to get my global traveler permit. It is kind of a shame that the photo of me on that card is going to immortalize this scar! Meh, whatever, it will just remind me of a time in my life.

It is very encouraging though that I have 2 frozen gel packs and half a head of cabbage taped to my boobs with an ace bandage, I have to go through the full body search machine, and nothing tips their radar!  Protect and serve gents!  You do know that semtex is a gel?  (Just as well you stole my 2 cans of Heinz baked beans last month.  Protecting the security of the nation!)

This is all food that I made from the organic stuff Elana got from the farmer’s market. The fruit salad has raw honey on it (she specifically bought some as she knows you can’t eat it when you are up the dufff!)

The coddled eggs I made were yum. Trevor’s had lots of meat – mine had an organic mushroom base – both were topped with fresh heirloom tomatoes, basil and Gruyère cheese

Bee came over on Sunday and made us brunch.

Strapped boobies, before they got ginormous and before the milk came in. These days we pack them every single day with cabbage and ice and they are so painful. The doctor recommended drinking sage tea, so I do that too! (Sage tea and cabbage, really? And this is the Western doctor recommending this!) I do WHATEVER is possible to make them stop swelling and the milk go away sooner. I still cannot believe that in this day and age the doctors still recommend cabbage to shorten the period of your impactation and milk coming in!! They give you a printed hand-out on it!

Sometimes I wake up and they are squirting boiling hot milk into the air. I prefer the evil super hero name “milk mistress”, but Trevor prefers “milk maid”

This was sent to me by Jack…. It is a giant red ball, in my seat. With a rum flask., I guess that kinda represents me? 🙂

I will never ever in my whole life forget Chris and Mags teaching me what real friends are and ignoring my requests for them to not help and just being there creating an assembly line to fill the flasks for the team party before I even got into the office that day!.

This was the Wednesday. The day of the first dilation. definitely the most painful day of my life (including all motorbike mishaps and broken bones!) I cried on the table at the doctor’s office and they had to give me a valium. They gave me valium and vicodin to take home. For some reason I thought the valium worked better and didn’t take the vicodin. It is only 2 weeks later I am wondering if it was because it was also mental pain.

Dana bought these stargazers. Of course she would remember what my favourite flowers are. They go by my bed so I can smell them at all times.  I think it was somewhere around this time I decided I wanted to capture the condolence gifts people had given me, so I would never forget their generosity.

Zynga sent these flowers. They are on the doorstep when I arrive back from the hospital. I don’t know why, and I guess the timing is a coincidence. I don’t think people knew about today.

This is the second bouquet Elana bought me. She sent some to me at work when she heard the news and today she arrived at my door one day carrying great foods from the farmers’ market and flowers. She won’t even stay and bother me, she leaves the meter running on the taxi and is in and out – just leaving the house stocked with perfect easy-to-make/nibble-on things in her wake.

September 14th. It’s the day of the D&E, which is totally painless – although they tactlessly only have one book in the waiting room – and it is about a weird Indian called Mustard and how he has his multiple children. I sit in my hospital gown and Trevor reads it aloud to me until they come and get me. I am calm as they put me out although I know I start to cry. The op is completely painless. I am out for the whole thing, but I wake up screaming. It is 20 mins before I can be transferred to the right place to see T. I am calm by then. He takes me home and puts me to bed. View from my bed (where I spend a lot of time!)

I think from this point on, I vastly underestimated what the emotional and physical toll would be.  I think I thought the D&E would be like the D&C I had the first time.  Boy, was I wrong!

(And it’s not even my birthday)